Tanaga Ukol Sa Tanaga

I’d like to post here some rough draft for a change.

I thought of writing a Tanaga poem about a Tanaga poem while aboard a jeep going to some remote town and this is what I got:

Kaisipa’y piniit
Sa tulang maliit
Salitang hati’y pito
magkatunog ang dulo

6:34 AM 7/26/2006

I texted the above to myself because it was hard to write aboard the sweeping and swerving jeep.

Recently, I just completely rewrote it:

Pitong hati – ’sang linya
Kaisipa’y piniit
Linya’y apat – ’sang tula
Kaisipa’y binaggit

11:23 PM 8/5/2006

I think both are very wrong. The first one is AABC while the second one is ABCB.

Somehow, I’m not satisfied without the traditional AAAA rhyme. Hmmm… Where’s that pencil?